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Don’t Give It All Away

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Self Care.

Hello, Everyone!

This month we are breaking up the holiday chatter (but also…Happy Holidays!) to share with you all a candid, quite raw rendition of one’s experience of navigating relationships in recovery and traversing the journey of healing from co-dependency.  We love this timeless reminder that no matter what type of relationships we are fostering at the moment, we must always hold space for ourselves, nurture ourselves, and remain present with ourselves.

This piece was gifted by an Anonymous Recovery Warrior.

To my sister-

There will be someone that promises you the life you’ve always imagined having.  Constant, unwavering assurances of safety, security, and happiness will dance from their lips, forming the most entrancing, tempting ballet.  They will do it all right, and I mean everything.  From flowers, love notes, and elegant dinners to warm embraces and kisses as soft as the clouds.  These are all beautiful things to treasure, but love, don’t give it all away.

There will be someone that snatches your attention so violently and abruptly that they send you spinning into a whirlpool of your own thoughts.  For a while you’ll think you’re drowning in that perfect something.  You’ll immerse yourself in their cool, refreshing pool in an attempt to cleanse yourself, but please promise to stay where your feet can touch the bottom.  The deep end is colder, darker than you’d expect it to be- every time.   Darling, try to keep that beautiful head above the water.  Don’t give it all away.

There will be someone that you love to hate.  They will be your flame, you will be their gasoline.  You will pour your body over them like hot, melted wax just begging for a shape to take.  You will sugar yourself until they deem you the sweetest candy they have ever tasted.  You’ll surrender to the fire.  Passion is part of the game, but sissy, don’t give it all away.

There will be someone that changes your life.  You’ll think, speak, act, and do things differently than ever before.  You’ll set this new you into motion with a force so strong you’ll convince everyone you’ve had a revelation.  Your mind will shift, your attitudes will be altered, your dispositions will transform. Old habits will die, new ones will be born.  Perspective is powerful and changes are good, but look before you leap, baby.  Don’t give it all away.

There will be someone that makes themselves your project.  They will latch on, and you will mother their insecurities.  You’ll stroke their fragile ego.  You will find yourself cleaning up the foul waste of their childlike outbursts, uncontrolled and unpredictable.  You’ll wipe the floor of their mess and your tears of exhaustion, sanitize with affection, and you’ll wait for the next explosion.  You’ll hope that these nightmarish times will pass and that like the flu, it will get worse before it gets better.  My sister, I am here to tell you that there will always be another explosion, always another mess that will keep you on your knees.  Don’t give it all away.

There will be someone you love.  You’ll know it when you know it.  Your head will turn to them, and you’ll meet each other on an even playing field.  You’ll overlook things that are slightly inconvenient to preserve the pleasure of being a pair.  You’ll share yourself with them and they will reciprocate.  You’ll want them feverishly and vehemently.  You’ll experience compromise.  You’ll sacrifice genuinely but my god- don’t ever give it all away.

You see, there will always be someone.  There will always be high highs and low lows but whatever you do, don’t give it all away.  Don’t give all of yourself.  Don’t drain yourself dry.  Don’t burn yourself until the wick disappears.  Not ever.  If you ever take a piece of my advice, please let it be this one.  Leave some of you for you, no matter what.

Holiday Survival Guide: ED Recovery

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care.

Here we are again. It’s holiday time.

Regardless of what, when, where, or how you celebrate, the hustle and bustle of the season has the potential to be overwhelming and sometimes, downright scary. So how do we navigate nourishment of our bodies and our minds in the midst of the chaos?

Check out these ideas below:

  • Make a plan. Seriously. Do it. Even if you don’t think you need to. 
    • Events involving food will likely be unavoidable over the next few months. Food is a normal part of human connection and gathering and for those in recovery from an eating disorder or disordered eating, this fact may feel quite anxiety-provoking. To say it simply, this is not the time to “wing it” or “see what will happen” or “talk about it later”. Taking the time to discuss these events, the food, and the fears around it all may be the ticket to maintaining recovery efforts.
  • Give support, get support.
    • Stay in touch with your support systems, people! It is very easy to skip your usual weekly support group or neglect to call back an accountability partner when we are feeling inundated with the many pressures of the holidays (family, travel, food, celebration, obligations, and the list goes on…). The heart of the matter is that because of these very pressures, you may need more support now than you’re able to realize…and we are thinking that may also ring true for the accountability partner from which you missed a call!
  • Make space for emotion. 
    • Everyone’s relationship to this season is different, yet we are all more stressed than usual in one way or another. Recognizing the nuances of your needs and waving ‘hello’ to whatever emotions or feelings you may be experiencing is a great first step to being able to cultivate a holiday-specific self-care regimen. See our August Blog Post on more ideas for gentle self-care during high-stress times!
  • Cope effectively. 

Do you have any tried and true methods for surviving the holiday season? Share your tips and tricks in the comments below!

 

 

 

 

Five Reasons Diet Culture is So Enticing

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Body Image, Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care. 2 Comments on Five Reasons Diet Culture is So Enticing

Diet culture is pervasive. The messages we internalize are often received inadvertently and yet, they sometimes gain immense power that can shift our mindset and behavior related to how we treat our bodies. How does this happen? Jamie Marchetti, Registered Dietitian and Author of the Wonderfully Well blog sheds some light on the ways diet culture can easily capture our attention and arrest us in our journey toward intuitive nourishment and insightful self care.

It’s okay to not get the massage.

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Self Care. 1 Comment on It’s okay to not get the massage.

Self care. Self care. Self care.

While reserving space and time to care for ourselves in a chaotic, pressurized world is essential, the concept of “self care” has also become idealized and even exploited in recent years. Certain forms of self care (ex. “spa days”, exercise, etc.) have been pedestalized in mainstream media, which narrows the vision of self care considerably and reduces accessibility and inclusiveness for, well…the majority of people.

There are many reasons why people may avoid caring for themselves, and we believe that feeling pressure to create a luxurious experience for oneself every time we engage in self care only adds to the mix. The purpose of this post is to let you know that it is perfectly alright to choose boring, less “shiny” forms of self care when they meet your needs more efficiently and that it is important to pay attention to what those needs actually are in the first place.

“But I have no clue what I need!”

We hear you – totally and completely.

Start here:

Taking a moment to consider how you are feeling can help you choose self care activities that will be most appropriate for bringing you back to a more balanced place. We know, we know, getting in touch with feelings is everyone’s faaavorite activity (haha, not), but doing so can tell us more about what we are truly needing.

Below are a few examples of how to tie it all together!

Example 1:

Feeling/affect: Bored, isolated, lonely

Potential need: Connection

Possible self care activities: Reach out to a friend or support person, engage with recovery-positive social media, try a group movement class, etc.

Example 2:

Feeling/affect:  Overwhelmed, over-extended, “burnt out”

Potential need: Rest

Possible self care activities: Rest (nap, go to bed early, sleep in), massage or spa treatment, cancel plans, etc.

Example 3:

Feeling/affect: Anxious, restless, unsettled

Potential need: Calm, comfort

Possible self care activities: Guided meditation, grounding/breathing technique, nature walk, etc.

For more self-care inspiration, check out the link below about “boring self care” and one of our favorite Instagram profiles: @makedaisychains 

‘Boring Self-Care’ Drawings Celebrate Everyday Mental Health Victories

*Disclaimer* Choose what feels right to you. These suggestions are in no way absolute and are not meant to replace your current self care regimen, only to enhance your mindfulness around it. You don’t have to fit any mold ever, and we want you to choose self care activities that help you feel like your best self, no matter how trendy, luxurious, involved, simple, or boring they are or are not.

 

 

 

 

 

How To Look After Your Mental Health Whilst Travelling

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care.

Ahhhh, summer-time: the season of beach weekends, family vacations, trips, and travel.  This time of the year can be a whirlwind of fun and adventure, but let’s get real – it can also be extremely stressful and challenging for recovery.

How can we take recovery on vacation with us?  How do we maintain the efforts necessary to stay stable and safe without compromising enjoyment and spontaneity?

Check out this post from Moods, Meds, and Meals, a mental health and lifestyle blog, on how to care for yourself and still enjoy the summer (or any season, really) of fun around you.

Sharing the Love

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Body Image, Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care, Uncategorized.

This month’s post pays homage to some of our most favorite blogs.  We at Nutritious Thoughts are showing appreciation, sending shout-outs, and sharing the LOVE with some stellar platforms that are recovery-positive and rooted in joyful living.

Favorite #1: Dances With Fat

Writer Ragen Chastain (she also identifies as many other incredible things – seriously check her out!) is REAL. We love this blog for the relatable content, post consistency (new reads monthly – yay!), and conversational spark in her writing.

Some common themes in this blog include: Health At Every Size (HAES), weight neutrality, size diversity, ditching diet culture, and lots of other awesomeness!

Click here to visit Dances With Fat

Favorite #2: Julie Duffy Dillon 

We love her blog, yes, but really just everything about this wonderful human is worth getting to know.  Julie is a nutrition therapist and eating disorder specialist that is passionate about helping others find peace with food, movement, and their bodies.  

Some common themes in this blog include: Eating Disorder & disordered eating recovery, PCOS, body image, mindful and intuitive eating, and lots of other awesomeness!

Click here to visit Julie’s blog

Favorite #3: Iris Cullinan

Perspective. That’s what we love about this blog. Iris is a Intuitive Career and Business Coach in Asheville, NC (Hey, neighbor!) and is a recovery advocate. Her vision is extraordinary, and her writing embodies elements of the recovery experience like no other.  

Some common themes in this blog include: self-care, motivation, mindfulness, life changes and transformation, and lots of other awesomeness! 

Click here to visit Iris’s blog

Happy reading, everyone!

 

 

 

 

Spring Forward – The Movement towards more Recovery Positive Media

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care. 2 Comments on Spring Forward – The Movement towards more Recovery Positive Media

Spring time –

A season hallmarked by growth, renewal, and according to popular point of view…getting “bikini ready”.  This time of year, many media outlets flood the public with messages promoting appearance-focused methods of “self-improvement”.  You know the type!  Daily interaction with the world around us may not completely eliminate exposure to suggestions such as “eat this” or “shave that” or “exercise like they do”; however, we do have some autonomy related to the media we choose to pay our attention to.

How do we make the shift to engaging in more recovery-positive media when intrusive messages seem to be everywhere?

Step One:

Notice what you are reading, scrolling through, purchasing, and watching.  What messages are you receiving from these sources?  Could they be negatively impacting your self image?  Do you find yourself playing the game of comparison?

Unfollow the account.  Unsubscribe to the magazine.  Change the channel.  Donate the book.  Block them on Facebook.

Step Two: 

Try curating uplifting sources of media that don’t pressure an “ideal”.  We’ve gathered some of our favorites for you to check out (see below!).

Books/Authors:

  • Meera Lee Patel – “My Friend Fear: Finding Magic in the Unknown”
  • Gretchen Rubin – “The Happiness Project”
  • Jen Sincero – “You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life”
  • Brené Brown – “The Gifts of Imperfection”

Instagram Accounts:

  • bymariandrew (Mari Andrew)
  • thebodyisnotanapology (The Body is Not an Apology)
  • thinkgrowprosper (A Wealth of Wisdom)
  • hellosunshine (Hello Sunshine)

Magazines:

  • Darling
  • Lucia

Podcasts:

  • Love, Food – by Julie Duffy Dillon
  • Body Kindness – by Rebecca Scritchfield

Step Three:

Enjoy connecting with the world around you without feeling inadequate in any way, shape, or form.

Boom!

*cue the fireworks*

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Me

Written by nutritiousthoughtsblog on . Posted in Eating Disorder Recovery, Self Care. 3 Comments on Dear Me

I wrote this letter to myself at a painfully pivotal point in my life.  I still read it regularly and hope it provides a sense of safety, hope, and unity to others that may need it.

-Lindsey M. Yemc, MS, RD, LDN

This is a letter to yourself when things seem impossible.  Read this when success is blooming everywhere around you, and you feel as though you’re the seed that never germinated. Read this when you’re waiting for someone to say “it’s your turn”.

Dear me,

Let your tears fall, and with them, every misconceived notion that you’re not enough.  Breathe.  Open up your heart to every uncertainty in your life, every unknown, every question.  Feel uncomfortable.  The answer right now is that you just don’t know.  Accept yourself in this state.  As inglorious as it is, it is real, and being real in a terribly fake world is an achievement unfamiliar to most.

Sit here for a moment.  Do not write yourself off.  Settle in.  Disrobe your pride.  You are allowed to feel that life is sometimes unfair and unnecessarily cruel, because it absolutely is.  Understand that you are human; perhaps the most difficult thing to be in this universe.

Credit yourself.  You alone have accomplished many feats.  You have fought giants and monsters.  You feel empty with dreamy optimism, but warrior, you are full of everything you need to fight.  Freshen up your war paint, another battle is just around the corner.  You are essential personnel – rain or shine, you must trust yourself to show up.

Embrace your complexity.  You are a goddess, a serpent of solidity.  Flexible, yet unshakable. You are elemental.  The wind in your hair ignites a flame that can burn every one of your insecurities to the ground.  Know your power.

Once you’ve rediscovered the dynamic potential of your life, your incredible aptitude to design and actualize exquisite beauty, propel yourself in the dance of determination.

Love always,

Me